Camp and the lesson I learned

Today I dropped off Regan at camp.  A fun time...Wouldn't you think?  But to my almost 5th grader the answer is kind of.  You see my daughter is worried about whether she will make friends while she is there.  She is worried about the fact that most of the kids she knows are in a different cabin than hers.  This is WAY OUTSIDE her comfort zone.  If it had been up to her, she would have gotten right back in the car and come home.  Unfortunately for her, I am the Mom and I told her that she had to stay and make new friends.  Ahh the joys of motherhood! 

On the way back home though I got to thinking...How often am I like that? 

Something new?  I'm petrified. 

Different people?  What will I say?

My comfort zone?  Comfortable...without much change.

The word "brave" isn't really in my vocabulary.  I'm like the biggest chicken on the block YET I am smart enough to know this isn't what I want for my kids so I push them.  My kids hate this but eventually they see the benefits of my pushing and become braver, more confident children.  My oldest is getting ready to go to college and while he is very ready (see I did something right!), I find that I am not.  I have been testy and cranky.  Snapping at my kids and husband over things that really don't really matter, just because I am letting my fears control me. 

Hmm...I wonder if I need to take some of my own advise.  God is my Father.  He is gently pushing me into this new phase of life and all I am doing is kicking and screaming (which even my daughter is mature enough not to do).  Ouch!  Maybe it's time to quit worrying and to take a step of faith into this brand new adventure that is before me.  It might hurt but, like my daughter, maybe it's just what I'll need.